13 February 2014
47. Ryan Wonsiak (19??—    )

Ryan Wonsiak, keyboardist player from Canadian band Austra, is one of the more intriguing people to make this year’s Hot List. And not just because there are a lot of people in Austra and it took me a while to figure out which one was him. Although I did just spend kind of an unnecessary amount of time on that. (I can now say definitively that while I find Wonsiak sort of unconventially attractive, Dorian Wolf is definitely more my type.)

47. Ryan Wonsiak (19??— )

Ryan Wonsiak, keyboardist player from Canadian band Austra, is one of the more intriguing people to make this year’s Hot List. And not just because there are a lot of people in Austra and it took me a while to figure out which one was him. Although I did just spend kind of an unnecessary amount of time on that. (I can now say definitively that while I find Wonsiak sort of unconventially attractive, Dorian Wolf is definitely more my type.)

48. Sam Elliott (1944—    )
2012 Ranking: #41

With no disrespect to Sam Elliott here, I’m a little frazzled today with work things and so I’m going to just be really lazy and say “Hey just read what Bubbles said last time”.

48. Sam Elliott (1944— )
2012 Ranking: #41

With no disrespect to Sam Elliott here, I’m a little frazzled today with work things and so I’m going to just be really lazy and say “Hey just read what Bubbles said last time”.

49. Fred Fortin (1971—    )

If you’re anything like me then you’re not really familiar with the work of Fred Fortin, Quebecois singer-songwriter and founding member of Galaxie 500. (Not THE Galaxie 500, but a different band from the early 2000’s who for some reason called themselves Galaxie 500 but then—I’m assuming for all kinds of reasons—shortened it to just Galaxie. Their 2011 album Tigre et diesel is streaming on Bandcamp. I’ve got it on now and it’s pretty good!

49. Fred Fortin (1971— )

If you’re anything like me then you’re not really familiar with the work of Fred Fortin, Quebecois singer-songwriter and founding member of Galaxie 500. (Not THE Galaxie 500, but a different band from the early 2000’s who for some reason called themselves Galaxie 500 but then—I’m assuming for all kinds of reasons—shortened it to just Galaxie. Their 2011 album Tigre et diesel is streaming on Bandcamp. I’ve got it on now and it’s pretty good!

50. Justin Theroux (1971—    )

I guess I knew in a vague sense that Justin Theroux was dating Jennifer Aniston, but it still seems off to me that an actor I mainly know from David Lynch films would be a tabloid star. Nevertheless, he’s pretty hunky, either with the big Mulholland Dr. glasses or with the more recent attempts at facial hair.

50. Justin Theroux (1971— )

I guess I knew in a vague sense that Justin Theroux was dating Jennifer Aniston, but it still seems off to me that an actor I mainly know from David Lynch films would be a tabloid star. Nevertheless, he’s pretty hunky, either with the big Mulholland Dr. glasses or with the more recent attempts at facial hair.

51. Yves Klein (1928-1962)

Fussy, smart-alecky French artist Yves Klein died in 1962 after a series of heart attacks; he was only 34. Best known for his patented color, International Klein Blue, he also made headlines with La spécialisation de la sensibilité à l’état matière première en sensibilité picturale stabilisée, Le Vide, a nearly empty gallery.

51. Yves Klein (1928-1962)

Fussy, smart-alecky French artist Yves Klein died in 1962 after a series of heart attacks; he was only 34. Best known for his patented color, International Klein Blue, he also made headlines with La spécialisation de la sensibilité à l’état matière première en sensibilité picturale stabilisée, Le Vide, a nearly empty gallery.

52. Matthew McConaughey (1969—    )

I’ve heard really good things about True Detective, and if it’s as good as I’m hearing then I might actually become a Matthew McConaughey fan. I really loved every single part of Magic Mike, but the best part of all was when Matthew McConaughey did his “Ladies of Tampa” number. It made me sort of love him in a way that I’ve never particularly loved him before, not even that time when he got arrested for playing the bongos naked while possessing marijuana.

52. Matthew McConaughey (1969— )

I’ve heard really good things about True Detective, and if it’s as good as I’m hearing then I might actually become a Matthew McConaughey fan. I really loved every single part of Magic Mike, but the best part of all was when Matthew McConaughey did his “Ladies of Tampa” number. It made me sort of love him in a way that I’ve never particularly loved him before, not even that time when he got arrested for playing the bongos naked while possessing marijuana.

12 February 2014
53. Ewan McGregor (1971—    )
2012 Ranking: #14

Oh, Ewan. Probably the single hottest movie star of my teenaged years—first in Trainspotting and then in Velvet Goldmine—I still get a little swoony when I think about him, even now that he’s well into his forties. August: Osage County seems awful (even if it does have an abnormally good poster) and I opted against Jack The Giant Slayer because I’m not, you know, twelve. But I’m looking forward to both Jane Got A Gun and Our Kind of Traitor.

53. Ewan McGregor (1971— )
2012 Ranking: #14

Oh, Ewan. Probably the single hottest movie star of my teenaged years—first in Trainspotting and then in Velvet Goldmine—I still get a little swoony when I think about him, even now that he’s well into his forties. August: Osage County seems awful (even if it does have an abnormally good poster) and I opted against Jack The Giant Slayer because I’m not, you know, twelve. But I’m looking forward to both Jane Got A Gun and Our Kind of Traitor.

54. Jimmy Fanz (19??—    )

With no disrespect to Jimmy Fanz’s furry chest, his low-hanging nuts, his marvelously bushy crotch, or his face, I have to say that without question my favorite thing about Jimmy Fanz is his ass. It’s such a good ass, all fuzzy and round and frequently getting penetrated by anyone and everyone. (Unfortunately decent photos that show asses and faces at the same time are hard to come by, which is why I opted for this woodsy one.) 

Jimmy’s pretty young to be on a Hottest Something Ever list, but give it a few years and let’s see what happens: this kid might be going places!

54. Jimmy Fanz (19??— )

With no disrespect to Jimmy Fanz’s furry chest, his low-hanging nuts, his marvelously bushy crotch, or his face, I have to say that without question my favorite thing about Jimmy Fanz is his ass. It’s such a good ass, all fuzzy and round and frequently getting penetrated by anyone and everyone. (Unfortunately decent photos that show asses and faces at the same time are hard to come by, which is why I opted for this woodsy one.)

Jimmy’s pretty young to be on a Hottest Something Ever list, but give it a few years and let’s see what happens: this kid might be going places!

55. Alain Delon (1935—    )

French actor Alain Delon is perhaps at his most swoonworthy in Plein Soleil, the original French film adaptation of The Talented Mr. Ripley. Bright Lights Film Journal describes it well: A film like Rene Clement’s Purple Noon (1958) lingers in the mind because either the director or the producers, the Hakim brothers, were so obsessed with Alain Delon that they simply abandoned all taste, talent, and logic for an extended “meditation” on the fetching actor’s bulging crotch and smooth flesh. This is a European summer fashion show featuring Delon in a variety of g-strings, bikini briefs, and painted-on pants. I highly recommend it, although I highly recommend Delon in anything, because even a silly fake-looking moustache (in 1970’s Le Cercle Rouge, pictured) can’t disguise ow utterly dreamy he is.

55. Alain Delon (1935— )

French actor Alain Delon is perhaps at his most swoonworthy in Plein Soleil, the original French film adaptation of The Talented Mr. Ripley. Bright Lights Film Journal describes it well: A film like Rene Clement’s Purple Noon (1958) lingers in the mind because either the director or the producers, the Hakim brothers, were so obsessed with Alain Delon that they simply abandoned all taste, talent, and logic for an extended “meditation” on the fetching actor’s bulging crotch and smooth flesh. This is a European summer fashion show featuring Delon in a variety of g-strings, bikini briefs, and painted-on pants. I highly recommend it, although I highly recommend Delon in anything, because even a silly fake-looking moustache (in 1970’s Le Cercle Rouge, pictured) can’t disguise ow utterly dreamy he is.

56. Max Grand (1970?—    )

From 1992’s Latin Tongues through 2010’s In The Zone, Salvadorean porn star Max Grand spent nearly two decades in front of the camera. Why he’s not cemented in history as one of the great gay porn stars remains a mystery; he’s certainly good-looking enough, and his long dick would surely be memorable enough to the hundreds of guys that rode it over the years.

56. Max Grand (1970?— )

From 1992’s Latin Tongues through 2010’s In The Zone, Salvadorean porn star Max Grand spent nearly two decades in front of the camera. Why he’s not cemented in history as one of the great gay porn stars remains a mystery; he’s certainly good-looking enough, and his long dick would surely be memorable enough to the hundreds of guys that rode it over the years.